Quick thoughts on Free Will

I have been thinking alot about free will lately. For most of my life I have believed that I am in charge of my choices and I have been endowed by my creator to do as I please and hope that it pleases Him as well. Lately I have begun to question whether I am free at all and maybe I am influenced by more than the "essential Justin" living inside my skull.

I can't escape that I am influenced by my family, especially my parents. My parents divorced when I was five and it has colored my life in both tragic and hopeful shades that I am just beginning to unravel. I would like to believe that my faith in Christ was a decision I made on my lonesome and I now "own" my faith but the rhetoric is failing. I owe my family and friends my faith more that myself.

I am influenced by world events that I can't control. If September 11th has not colored your view of the world then you have lived under a rock for the last 7 years. If you do live under a rock and you are somehow reading this then I guarantee that you live under a rock for reasons that are outside yourself. You made the choice but you were influenced more than either of us realise.

I can't escape my peers opinions. Most likely if I buy a shirt at the store and my wife thinks it is dorky I will not wear it. Or I will were it just to prove to her it is not dorky. Even my decision to buy the shirt is influenced by mass marketing and how cool the guy in the picture looks when he has it on.

How do I escape these influences? Should I? I think they are there for a reason. I am still trying to figure it out.

Travel Log: Brown County

The whole Bed and Breakfast thing is quite alien to me. You go to someones home and you stay there and then they make you breakfast. I always thought it was a cute idea, quaint actually but it was never something that I considered doing.

When my boss gave Linds and I a free stay at The Allison House in Nashville IN I liked the idea but I was a touch hesitant. I have never been one to turn down a chance for adventure (especially if it is free) but weekend time is precious time and you have to spend it wisely. With hope in our hearts we packed up our bags and headed south for the weekend and were pleasantly surprised. Brown county was quite beautiful despite it being late winter (I suppose if you were and optimist it is early spring). Nashville is full of the artsy local color that Brown County is known for. It sports a plethora of arts and crafts (genuine custom leather wristbands $5 baby!), the nations smallest movie theater and is minutes from Brown County State Park. The Allison House is a charming little place in the heart of Nashville. Jeff and September were great hosts and the conversation at the breakfast table was lots of fun. Its location makes it a great home base to launch out and enjoy what Brown County has to offer.

I would not recommend going in the off season simply because there is not as much to do but either way as quick weekend getaways go I still give in 4 out of 5 stars.

Thinking of writing again

Ok so I have been horrible at updating and thinking. The mundane has really been dragging me down this last year and I have not had the energy/discipline/desire to write anything in quite a while. Call it writers block with a mix of mild depression and constant moving. Linds and I realized the other day that since marriage we have moved around once every six months and in this last year we moved 3 times officially and a road trip or two in between there. It was a blast but in the end it we mostly escapism.

So here I am in front of the computer again in an apartment that is starting to feel like home and in a mid Lent epiphany I realized that I want and need to start writing again. I am going to change the format a bit...I might even change the location but from here on out I am going to be writing alot more. Some insights, some poetry, some drek about what I had for breakfast...either way I am going to be here more often.