Busyness

“Busyness is next to godliness” – Most American Christians

I am a busy person. I fill my day with a lot of stuff. Some of it is important. I plan Bible studies and trips for the students in my youth group. I take time to meet and council people in my community. I try to make time for my wife. I do a lot of “good Christian things.” I even get paid some of them. At first glance one might be tempted to call me a godly man. I do all this stuff for God so I must be godly. People think, “He is busy, therefore he is godly.” I am not sure they are right.

I remember when I was in college how I loved to recite how busy I was. I would go through the list of all the good things I “just had to do.” I felt so godly and I think people thought I was. Truth be told I was so busy then and am still so busy now I have very little time for God himself. I do a lot for Him but I spend so little time knowing Him. I wonder how many “good Christians” get to heaven and say, “Look at all we did for you Lord!” only to hear God say, “Depart from me I never knew you.”

If we allow busyness to be our reward, that is all we will get. Sure we will get a lot of pats on the back and get “burnt out for Jesus” but will we ever know the one God we are working for. Do we really think that eternal rewards are dispensed on the basis of how little time we make for God? I think we do and it needs to stop.

I think we say “Faith without works is dead” far too often. We do a lot of works at the expense of knowing God. Biblically speaking knowing God is not facts and figures or even serving. It implies a much deeper, personal and time consuming connection. I wonder how many of us are willing to give up our measurable acts of service for a deeper and hidden understanding of Christ. It is going to be hard and it will take time but it will ultimately be the substance of true godliness that will last.

If we don’t have love…we are nothing.

Talk amongst yourselves

Prayer

I am often amazed at my lack of prayer. I talk to the ceiling often but I think that I rarely pray. Let me walk you through a pretty common scenario in my life. Something bad happens, I pray “God help,” and I move on. Like a hitchhiker or a kid that can’t reach the cookies; once I get what I want I move on with a thank you and a goodbye. If I don’t get what I want I pray “Why God” and then move on to fix the problem myself.

I am finding that so much of my prayer life is really a series of prayer-speeches to the ceiling. I don’t pray to encourage communication with the Almighty, I pray for self-help or self-benefit. I don’t worship God, I try to get God to do what I want and if he does not I assume he is being silent and wants me to do it myself. One of these days I will figure out that silence is not an answer. Nowhere in scripture is God’s silence an indication of anything good. It is usually a sign of the people’s inability or refusal to hear what he is in fact saying. If God says no I refuse to hear it. I will misquote passages like Jeremiah 29:11 so I can get the chief benefit. I forget that it is God who has the plans and not me.

I talk about having a “personal relationship with Jesus” but what is a relationship without communication between two people anyway? People might think talking to God and listening for His answer is insane or unhealthy but I say the opposite is true. Who in their right mind asks a question with no intent of ever finding out the answer? I am tired of making prayer-speeches to the God-in-the-attic, I want to converse with the King of Kings. It is a right that the blood of Christ bought for me and I think that I am a fool not to make use of it every day. I read about God regularly speaking not just in the Bible but to many people in human history. What excuse do I have for not tuning in and listening to Him?

Am I crazy to think that God will speak to me daily if I let him? Why do you think that? Does God give specific revelation anymore or did that stop when the Scriptures were closed and now all we get are vague impressions and dreams? By seeking to listen to God am I opening myself up to evil and sinful influences?

Talk amongst yourselves J

Suggested Reading: Hearing God by Dallas Willard and Prayer: Conversing with God by Rosalind Rinker

I'm Back

After about a month long hiatus I am back and have 2 new articles. One good the other is mostly fluff. I am sorry for the delay. We are making some big changes in our youth program and Lindsay had pseudo pneumonia so my mind has been anywhere but online.

Hope you enjoy,

Justin

Thoughts on Marriage Vol 1

Since I have only been married 6 months or so; I really don’t know much. So all you pros can get a good chuckle at me and all you single and engaged folk can chuckle and say, “That won’t happen to me.” Then the pros and I will chuckle at you 6 months from now.

Some things I am learning about marriage:

It is harder than you think. Imagine you take two people who are total opposites and make them live together for the rest of their lives. It would be total chaos for at least the first couple years if not forever. No matter how you mix it, it will get messy. Now imagine two people who think they are so perfect and alike (but really aren’t) and put them together for the rest of their lives. Chaos ensues. I love my wife dearly but we are finding out more and more just how different we are.

I think it started with the toilet seat. I had this fantasy woman who did not care about the toilet seat. It could be up or down and she did not care. I have found out through 6 months of rigorous empirical study that SHE DOES NOT EXIST. I thought Linds didn’t care about the toilet seat. I was wrong. It is not one of those things that really matters in the grand scheme of things (and yes I find myself putting it down these days) but it goes to show you that a lot of things you think you know about someone are really just in your head. Many things don’t come up in conversation until you live with someone.

Yet it is better than you think. Nothing really prepares you for how good marriage can be. There is just something nice about coming home to someone who loves you. Sure she likes the toilet seat down and she makes funny noises when she sleeps but she loves me and that makes all the difference. There is nothing like the rush when my wife says “come hug me” or “talk to me” or the always exciting “come to bed with me.” Where the rubber meets the road it is nice to have a friend that will not leave you. Death or neglect are the only things that can truly sever a marriage. Unlike college, jobs and girlfriends, marriage does not end.

I am more selfish than I realize. I have always been a little rough around the edges. One might even say that I am at rare times abrasive and irrational but overall I am a nice guy. That was until I got the mirror, her name is Lindsay, and through her I see everything. I say I love her so much. The mirror often tells me I love myself more. I say I’m sorry the mirror indicates I am not. Marriage is the ultimate reflection of me and sometimes I don’t see what I like. I think this is why so many marriages fall apart. It is hard to face yourself.

Love is more strongly rooted in the will than any other part of you. You have to choose to love someone. The more you choose to love someone the stronger the will and desire becomes (you say duh…try being married). Almost every decision I make can be tied to “Am I loving Lindsay by doing this or am I not.” Just like my partnership with God, my life is bound to my wife irreversibly. This causes a lot of complications to my personal agenda and like all exercise it can be tiring but I am better for choosing to love her.

Through marriage I am confronted with a lot of ugliness in me. It is tough but when I find that I am reacting differently to situations. When I see myself through her eyes and she is pleased. It really makes it worth it. I see more of myself but I have been able to put off more selfishness that I ever could have alone. There are times I find myself just wanting to love Lindsay for no gain or sex but just to love her. It’s good.

How many of you have had this harder/better or selfish/mirror experience? Some comments from pros would be helpful. I heard it takes about 10 years to really begin to become one…is this accurate? Given my experience which is the greater path to holiness; marriage or monkery?

Talk amongst yourselves J

More thoughts on the lack of men in the Church

“The church at present has been characterized as a place for women, wierdos and wimps” – “Why Men Hate Going to Church”

I have been reading this book and many others about church history and masculinity. What has happened to all the “real men”? I am not talking about the drinking/carousing/foul mouthed “real men.” I am talking about the bold, strong, courageous men that I read about in scripture and history but see few hints of in the average pew. I think they are there. I hope I am one of them, but I feel like we are all in hiding.

Often, I feel like I have to check my manhood at the door. I can’t be bold or courageous; I have to emulate “gentle Jesus meek and mild.” I can’t say what is really on my heart; someone’s feelings might get hurt. I know the fruit of the Spirit is “Love, joy, peace…kindness…gentleness…etc.” but we forget that all that is in the context of a rather pointed letter to the “foolish Galatians.” Besides, do we really have a biblical understanding of gentleness and kindness?

I wonder when the hiding started. Is it in Sunday school? Don’t talk, sit still, answer questions, play nice, be relational are all things girls are good at and most boys aren’t. In the end, “boys are treated like defective girls,” and resign themselves to being a little less spiritual. Was it during the Victorian era? When all the men had to leave the town to work in the mines and women began to shape and decorate the church.

Before I get crucified by all the ladies reading I want to say I am not bashing femininity. I am merely observing that the feminine spirit is alive and well while the masculine lays dormant, waiting for the chance to prove itself. The Church is by and large 80% female. No other world religion has this big of a gender deficit. Where are all the Christian men? Are we really less spiritual or are we just unable to be men given the present way we “do church”? Have you ever noticed this or is this just the absurd ramblings of the youth pastor? We have debated this issue for a while but really…how can the masculine spirit make a comeback?

Talk amongst yourselves J

Suggested Reading:
“Why Men Hate Going to Church” - Marrow
“Wild at Heart” - Eldredge
“All the King’s Men” - Weber
“Iron John” - Bly

Getting what you pay for

I pay good money for my entertainment every week…about 10% - anonymous

Entertainment is a great thing isn’t it. It is so good to just sit back and relax and watch someone else do what they love. It could be acting, playing football, or speeding through France on a bike. Whatever it is, we Americans love our entertainment. When I was a kid I remember going to watch the Cincinnati Reds with my Dad (this was in the ancient times when they were actually good). I remember watching them and wanting to be like them. I would pretend that I was Chris Sabo and my little league baseball field would somehow be transformed into Riverfront Stadium (now Cenergy Field). Even though I was awful at baseball I would be inspired by a good game.

I did this through out my life with just about every kind of entertainment. I was inspired by good books about knights, movies about bravery and the determination of a football team to get one more yard. When I saw or heard something great I would imitate it to the best of my ability. When King Arthur said, “Be honorable,” I took it to heart. As I grew older though, I began to be less inspired by the entertainment industry and more, well, entertained. It became more of a spectacle to watch and marvel at. A director’s skill would not inspire me to make movies; I would just sit and say it was neat. I put away the swords and songs and picked up “real life” and “respectable dreams.”

I wonder if this entertainment attitude has infected the church. We often come to be entertained but not transformed. We pay good money for good music and a good speech and walk away feeling pretty good about ourselves. We end up coming but never changing. We will criticize the “poor special effects” and miss Christ.

What would happen if we took a different approach? What if we started looking at the professional ministers and were inspired to do ministry? You don’t have to be paid to play baseball well; why would following Christ be any different? What if we held off our American need to be constantly entertained and actually did something inspiring? Let’s stop going to church like we go to the movies. Movies can speak but only God can transform. Will you be open to transformation or will you just pay 10% for a good show?

Am I right about the “entertainment me” attitude of the average churchgoer? Is the answer just to make church more entertaining and flashy? It is a big temptation but is it right? Where did we loose the transformational message of Christ?

Talk amongst yourselves - J

Ok so these questions have been pondered before but I have had writers block and needed to get something out. Hope it is still helpful